We Wanna Meet - Stories and Pictures coming soon!

I have SO MANY stories to tell about my awesome weekend with the girls at We Wanna Meet (along with a ton of incriminating pictures), but today is Halloween, laundry day, and grocery shopping day, so I promise I will have a full synopsis of my weekend tomorrow! Check back then!

Cue The Pointer Sisters

I'm so excited! And I just can't hide it! I'm about to lose control and I think I like it ~ OH YEAH!

Just Four more hours until I'm stuffing my face with food and then spitting it back out from laughing while I hang with some of the coolest chicks in all of Bloggetyville at this!

I'm sure we'll all be blogging in our heads the entire weekend. I can't wait to see how big of a fool I make of myself! Would you expect any less out of me?

A New Blogger in Da House!!

My very good friend, Erica (whom I just reconnected with after a million years) (is it 'who' or 'whom'?) just started her very own blog! (After I held a gun to her dog's head and demanded gently encouraged her to start one)

So go read her first few posts and keep going back to read her unbelievably awesome story (the one that she will be sharing very soon - AHEM!).

And be sure to smother her in bloggity love and let her know you stopped by!!!

**End of shameless plug. More witty sarcasm and disgusting stories coming soon.**

You might be a Redneck if...

If you've been reading my wildly entertaining and witty little blog for very long (please know that statement is drenched in sarcasm), then you know I come from....how should I put this....a long line of Hillbillies. Trailer Park dwellers. Country Folk. Good 'ole Boys.

You get the picture.

As mightily as I've tried to instill The Ways of the Suburban Yuppie into my children, giving them nary a glimpse of living in the sticks, only having neighbors with 5 teeth, and having a driveway consisting of dirt and potholes (that you should NOT drive down after a rain storm if you plan to leave again before the ground dries), somehow they have still managed to show off their hillbilly roots.

Kale more blatantly than anyone, what with his constant urges to drop trow on our front porch and pee into the yard. While traffic drives by. Did I mention our house is at the end of a cul-de-sac that butts up to the main road in our neighborhood? Or that we live directly next door to the school? And that he does this while he waits for Jacob to get home? And that all of the super-uptight moms that actually walk to the school to pick up their kids instead of stay home and watch t.v. see him and almost pass flat out behind their double jogging strollers and land on their velvet-jogging suit-clad behinds?

What was I saying? Oh yes... My Jeff Foxworthy-aspiring son.

The other night as I stood in my kitchen cookin' supper barefoot preparing the evening meal, Kale ran around shoeless and shirtless with fudgesicle and snot dried on his face played contently in our backyard on the kids' swing set/fort thingy. *What DO you call those monster, wood contraptions every backyard in suburbia has towering over our nicely stained privacy fences?

Anywho, he was playing in the backyard, I was cooking, and The Two Jakes were at wrestling practice. After they got home, I called Kale in for dinner.

During dinner, the following conversation ensued:

Kale (excitement oozing out of every fiber in his body): "Guess what!?"

Me: "You want to grow up to be a bazillionaire and buy your mom and dad a house in Italy and support my shopping hobby for the remainder of my years." (Hey. A girl can dream, can't she? I have an undying love for Italian shoes like any self-respecting fashionista.)

Kale (with a VERY proud grin plastered across his face): "I pooped in the back yard!"

(I swear I'm not making this up)

Jake and I in unison: "You did WHAT!?"

Jake (with me laughing uncontrollably under the table while he glared at me in disdain because he blames me for our boys' love of bathroom humor.) (Come on, it's FUNNY!!!!): "Well did you clean it up?"

Me (still snickering and giggling like the mature adult I am): "Dude. It's dark outside. Besides - how are we supposed to decipher dog poop from kid poop?"

Kale: "That's okay. The dogs ate it anyway." Followed by a big, satisfying belly laugh.

(GAG!!!!!!!!!!)

Yes, people. That's right. Hillbilly IS genetic. No matter how hard you try to keep it from rearing it's toothless, mullet-laden head, there's no use in fighting it.

I'm pretty sure it's just a matter of time for him to clear out the sink before he pees in it.

And what a proud Momma I'll be on that day. Because it will mean he is not doing it on the front lawn.

Product Review: O-Cel-O Scrub & Wipe Sponges

In my house we go through many 'o sponges due to the countless cheesy, egg-y dishes I scrub clean, the ginourmous counters I have to wipe down daily, plus all of the other surfaces requiring a squeaky clean shine.

Yesterday I waltzed into my beloved neighborhood Super Target to purchase dinner items and, yet again, replacement sponges for the kitchen. For years I have used Scotch brand No-Scratch blue sponges for my kitchen cleaning, but I have to replace them constantly.

Upon searching for my normal sponge selections, what do my wondering eyes should appear, but a colorful and lovely new invention that made my heart skip a beat and made me weak in the knees.

Behold, Dear Friendternets, the O-Cel-O Scrub and Wipe Sponges! They are two-sided with the first side consisting of a scratchy surface, only this time it's made of vinyl and rubber making it RINSE CLEAN after you scrub melted cheese off of pans or caked-on eggs off of your favorite skillet. The opposite side is made of a soft, plushy wash cloth fabric enabling me to wipe down my granite counters and leave them beautilicious and streak-free. Did I mention the fact that they RINSE CLEAN and don't hold on to yucky food gunk??

Since purchasing the first one to test, I have now returned to purchase 4 more to place around the house in all of the bathrooms. This is how much I love me some Scrub & Wipe Sponges! Now GO! Put them on your shopping list! You'll thank me for it. And I'll be thanking 3M for coming up with yet another ingenious product that I can not live without, with the Post-It being on the very top of that list.